If you aren't following John Nova Lomax on Facebook, why the hell not? John is one of the most interesting posters to FB. Lots of original content, music notes, and humor. Recently he did a post called "If Houston streets were given truthful names we would have:"
And he, his friends, and I chipped in with some suggestions. Enjoy!
Fire Ant Lane
Tree Roach Circle
Raging Bayou Boulevard
Pit Bull Mix Street
Boulevard of Trash Trees
Lol "Hundred-Year" Floodplain "Heights" Drive
La Avenida de las Cantinas
Strip Club Row
Lazy Couch Terrace
West Mount Mattress
Your Neighbors Suck Blvd.
Dumped Tire Mountain Lane
Stray Dog Chase
MS 13 Turf Blvd.
(A whole suburb of streets with names like): Zika, Chikingunya, Dengue, West Nile and Malaria
"Head north on Sludge Street, take a right onto Rancid Avenue, go over Toilet Paper Bayou, and then a left and you can't miss it"
Inexplicable Chow Dog Avenue
Flaming Vehicle Row
Ghost Bike Parkway
Developer Daughter's Lane (or wife or relatives)
Orange Cone Row
Suggestions for Telephone Road:
Clip Joint Row
Happy Endings Blvd
Oaks of Orgasm Gentlemen's District
Camino Chupa Cabra
Purple Drank Drive
Flor de Jose Campos Torres
Avenida de los Colchones
El Camino de Caca
(and a possible winner here): You're Totally Not Going To Save Any Time Cutting Through This Neighborhood Instead Of Staying On That Main Road No Matter How Backed Up It Is Drive
Commuter, Don't Let The Sun Set On You Here Blvd.
Dante's Inferno Way
Trans Fat Alley (John notes: "already in the vernacular of locals for that strip of Ella just north of 610 that includes a Taco Bell, Raisin' Canes, McD, and Carl's. All are next door to one another and it's tricky making sure you are in the correct drive-thru because they all use the same red/yellow color scheme)
(Elgin: a a possible second place winner) Eastheimer
(San Felipe) We're Smug Natives So We Know How To Say It Street
(San Felipe) White Privilege Way
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